Making Amends in Addiction Recovery
Making amends in addiction recovery is something that many newly sober people fear.
You take a look at the 12-steps and see that at some point you are supposed to make amends to those you may have caused harm to. The idea is terrifying. Fortunately, this is not the first step, and for good reason. Making amends in addiction recovery may seem daunting at first, but the freedom you gain afterwards is worth the temporary discomfort.
First, get a sponsor to walk you through the steps.
Newly sober individuals will try to jump the gun and start apologizing to everyone right away. Though the intentions are pure, this is not the best path forward. A sponsor that you trust will guide you through the process and explain how to make amends, ensuring that you are doing it for the right reasons. The whole point is to apologize for your part, inquire as to if there is anything you can do to right your wrong, and be content regardless of the response.
Making amends in addiction recovery can go many different ways.
Sometimes people you apologize to will tell you that they have no idea what you are talking about. Other times people will list all the things you have done to hurt them, some of which you may have forgotten. Our job is to sit quietly and patiently, not interrupting, and allow the person whom we have harmed to tell us exactly how they feel. We do not lash out or respond negatively. This is not about us.
Other times when trying to make amends in addiction recovery, we will find that doors are shut in our faces, phones are slammed, and we are ignored. This is also okay because the entire point of this step is that we are willing to right all the wrongs in our past. Making amends in addiction recovery requires willingness above all else.
If you or someone you love needs help overcoming addiction, please contact us anytime at (337) 456.9111.
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